BAAAAAAD DAY
It's 9 a.m. and I am drinking a beer. Why would one imbibe alcohol so early in the morning you ask? I'll tell you. I am supposed to be on vacation until 7 a.m. Monday morning. Instead I am hooked into a computer because an incompetent be-otch has decided that she is too busy to do her work. Thus, I had to return from vacation in order to straighten Ms. A-hole out.
My plan for today was: Drive to local store to buy kiddie pool since I don't have access to a real pool. Pick up margarita mix while there. Continue to liquor store to buy tequila. Return home and hook up hose to fill said kiddie pool. Put on bathing suit (two piece to scare the neighbors). Make pitcher of margaritas. Put beach music CD into stereo. Play said stereo LOUDLY. Jump into kiddie pool and tan ALL DAY. It was a really cool kiddie pool too. The kind with a slide and ring toss in case you get bored.
So far today I have: spilled an entire cup of coffee (no, not the small kind...a travel cup) on the kitchen counter soaking everything including the paper towels (you have to laugh at the irony). Sent scathing email to incompetent be-otch reminding her that it is much easier to work if your head is not BURIED IN YOUR ASS. Copied everyone except God on said email so that they would know that I returned from vacation to deal with said be-otch. Spent the last half-hour waiting for our almightly lawyers to respond to me with ideas on how to off Ms. A-hole....oops, I meant on what my next step should be. **Update** Add in dealing with Blogger's seizures this morning.
I AM NOT HAPPY. If anyone would be willing to go to Houston and do something completely nasty to the incompetent be-otch I would be willing to pay.
My plan for today was: Drive to local store to buy kiddie pool since I don't have access to a real pool. Pick up margarita mix while there. Continue to liquor store to buy tequila. Return home and hook up hose to fill said kiddie pool. Put on bathing suit (two piece to scare the neighbors). Make pitcher of margaritas. Put beach music CD into stereo. Play said stereo LOUDLY. Jump into kiddie pool and tan ALL DAY. It was a really cool kiddie pool too. The kind with a slide and ring toss in case you get bored.
So far today I have: spilled an entire cup of coffee (no, not the small kind...a travel cup) on the kitchen counter soaking everything including the paper towels (you have to laugh at the irony). Sent scathing email to incompetent be-otch reminding her that it is much easier to work if your head is not BURIED IN YOUR ASS. Copied everyone except God on said email so that they would know that I returned from vacation to deal with said be-otch. Spent the last half-hour waiting for our almightly lawyers to respond to me with ideas on how to off Ms. A-hole....oops, I meant on what my next step should be. **Update** Add in dealing with Blogger's seizures this morning.
I AM NOT HAPPY. If anyone would be willing to go to Houston and do something completely nasty to the incompetent be-otch I would be willing to pay.
posted by xwy at 9:23 AM
14 Comments:
omg, i actually know someone who would do that.i'm sorry you have started out on such a bad note. i hope you can get things sorted so that you can go back on vacation until monday. incompetance really does suck the big one. i did laugh while reading this, not at your expense, but just the way you tell the story of your day. and it is only 1040am here now. there is still time to go to the store, and the liquor barn and fill the pool and make like you are at the beach. take care.
I have friends in Houston. Big strong track athletes. Very fast.
How much?
I'll do it. For free.
I'm having that kind of day too and I REALLY need to take it out on someone....at least until I get that cattle prod.
;)
Hope things get better for you soon!
Poet - My decision exactly. I am returning to said plan until I hear from Ms. A-hole. Hopefully I will be so loaded with tequila by then that I won't care what she has to say.
Rick - Hmmm, tempting but see Stacy's response.
PQ - Texas is known for its livestock. I'm sure you could buy at cattle prod at the airport. Hope your day gets better too!
i got this cousin, Guido... Houston is on his way. ;) and i'll come to GA to help you make the best of the rest of your socalled vacation. i love the kiddie pool idea. i'll wear my speedo, to really scare the neighbors. and i love margaritas!!! we're set.
JD - Ooooo, that would work. Just fly over & parachute out....my back yard is big enough to land in ;)
Angie..
If I wasn't terrified of flying I would be there for ya.. hmm wondering how long it would take me to drive from KY.. you will probably have her taken care of by the time I could get there.. sit back and relax with Jose'.. you know the song.. "Jose Cuervo you are a friend of mine."
Take Care
Tammy
Angie, what pisses me off about this post is that you have to take time off of your vacation (is the job going to make it up to you?) and that your life is interrupted.
I don't know why you in a bikini should scare the neighbors. But if it's that frightening, then maybe you can confront your Houston co-worker in a two-piece. Just a thought.
BTW, you're going to need an awful lot of tequilla to fill a kiddie pool. But why mix it with water when you got the margarita fixins already?
Tammy - I say we rent a bus and all go down and kick her hiney!! I ran out of Jose so I now Coors Light is my friend. I gotta get to the liquor store =)
X - Yes, my friend. I was not happy about it either. My boss is swell and has given me 2 1/2 days back already ~ which makes this a little easier. I thought about not filling the pool with tequila but it's so much easier just to dunk my head rather than reach ALL the way out to get the pitcher :) The good thing is that all that alcohol pretty much keeps the bugs away.
Wow, what a fabulous idea with the kiddie pool, don't forget to close your eyes and pretend your in the tropics or something?
It's rattled my cage too that you had to cut short your holiday because someone else is so incompetent. I'm glad you'll get that time back again.
(I actually thought the 'sweet' smell of vodka might draw the insects not repel them, but ya learn something new everyday...next time I'm out in the sun, I'll spray alcohol all over my skin...or would that atrract the sunrays and burn me to a crisp? hm, better google that to check.
Lisa - Hey, sweets! Glad to see you. Yes, I turn the beach music up loud, pretend the concrete patio is actually sand. You have to drink a lot but eventually the feeling of being at the beach sets in...just kidding.
Actually, I think the bugs get drunk & stumble off to die. Again just kidding. The alcohol is for drinking only, not swimming in. Not sure about spraying it on your skin but it might attract the men!!
It should be legal to shoot such people(?). At least you made sure everyone knows that you interrupted your vacation for this.
Hope you are back on vacation now and chilling by the concrete beach.
Jack - It's a blow up baby pool. If you're under 25 lbs. you can actually use the slide....I think that disqualifies me but it makes a great back rest.
SJ - Yes, it should be legal. I think I'll call my Congressman today and request he back a new law ;)
ooooh, big backyard, pool, liquor, it's a date. ;) hey, i'd even come without all that stuff. :)
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