Sleep Deprived from TMI
I couldn't sleep last night. I've been fighting a bad case of bronchitis and sleeping a lot during the day. But that wasn't the reason. The steriods I've been taking to help me get over it tend to make me hyper...but that wasn't the culprit either.
I phoned my mom last night to wish her a happy New Year and find out the family gossip for this week. She glossed over the family happenings quite quickly and started explaining with great detail the activities of her weekend. This was quite odd as normally the detail would be placed on the family gossip. We talked about the movies her and her boyfriend saw and the restaurants they ate at. Then...the big New Year's Eve plans...
"we were supposed to go over to so-and-so's house (another couple they play cards with regularly) but they wanted us to spend the night and.... I'M NOT SHARING!"
Schreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech. *poof* (sound of circuits overloading in my brain) I shook my head several times in disbelief as her last words resonated in my ears. She didn't just say THAT...did she? No. Can't be. Think, THINK....change the topic. CHANGE THE TOPIC!!! Wait. Why would my mother jump to the conclusion that this couple wanted to swing? It was New Year's Eve. Couldn't it have been that they were just worried about drunk drivers?
"Mom, are you sure that's why they asked you to spend the night?"
"**giggles** Well, they've been a little friendly lately."
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! tmi....TMI. Brain overloading. Now, I've been known to let my own freak flag fly high and proud at times. And I'm very open-minded about how others choose to live their lives. BUT...this is MY MOTHER. She's a virgin! She DOES NOT have sex! She DOES NOT know about things like swinging! I don't exactly recall how but I managed to finish the conversation with her. I tried relentlessly to put it out of my head...but to no avail. I laid in bed, shuddering, trying to think of puppies, wildflowers, warm ocean breezes...anything to get this out of my head. Finally, I had to face the truth. My mother knows about sex. I'm off to take an extremely hot shower and wash my mouth out with soap. Can one of you please develop a TMI warning light for my phone? Please???
Happy New Year to all my bloggy buddies! I hope the New Year is filled with PLEASANT surprises for you. And may you never find out that your parents have sex. lol.
I phoned my mom last night to wish her a happy New Year and find out the family gossip for this week. She glossed over the family happenings quite quickly and started explaining with great detail the activities of her weekend. This was quite odd as normally the detail would be placed on the family gossip. We talked about the movies her and her boyfriend saw and the restaurants they ate at. Then...the big New Year's Eve plans...
"we were supposed to go over to so-and-so's house (another couple they play cards with regularly) but they wanted us to spend the night and.... I'M NOT SHARING!"
Schreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech. *poof* (sound of circuits overloading in my brain) I shook my head several times in disbelief as her last words resonated in my ears. She didn't just say THAT...did she? No. Can't be. Think, THINK....change the topic. CHANGE THE TOPIC!!! Wait. Why would my mother jump to the conclusion that this couple wanted to swing? It was New Year's Eve. Couldn't it have been that they were just worried about drunk drivers?
"Mom, are you sure that's why they asked you to spend the night?"
"**giggles** Well, they've been a little friendly lately."
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! tmi....TMI. Brain overloading. Now, I've been known to let my own freak flag fly high and proud at times. And I'm very open-minded about how others choose to live their lives. BUT...this is MY MOTHER. She's a virgin! She DOES NOT have sex! She DOES NOT know about things like swinging! I don't exactly recall how but I managed to finish the conversation with her. I tried relentlessly to put it out of my head...but to no avail. I laid in bed, shuddering, trying to think of puppies, wildflowers, warm ocean breezes...anything to get this out of my head. Finally, I had to face the truth. My mother knows about sex. I'm off to take an extremely hot shower and wash my mouth out with soap. Can one of you please develop a TMI warning light for my phone? Please???
Happy New Year to all my bloggy buddies! I hope the New Year is filled with PLEASANT surprises for you. And may you never find out that your parents have sex. lol.
posted by xwy at 8:28 AM
11 Comments:
I am so freakin' glad that you came back to post again!!! I've been patiently waiting around to hear more qirky stories!! :)
Yes..that is a scary thing to have to face... the fact that your parents had sex more than once.... I always knew they had to do it twice in my case (me and my sister) and the fact that my mom wasn't listed in the bible as the "other" virgin mother...
But as I got older and my Dad was willing to "talk" about it more... I just wanted to gag him to make him stop!!!
Gary - Glad someone still loves me. lol. Thanks for stopping back by.
I love that my mom and I are friends but...sometimes I just wish I could put a filter on the phone to drown out such "unpleasant" topics! HA!
Sheeesh...alright already, we'll just quit asking them to stay over if she feels like THAT!
Happy Happy New Year and i'm so glad to hear from you finally Angie!
OMG I DON'T want to know anything about my parents sex lives either. As far as i'm concerned we were all immaculate conceptions. Five times. Yep.
My MIL went into a little ditty not long ago about how she thought she was pregnant around the same time that my SIL was pregnant with her oldest son. All I could think was "Ewwww... y'all were still having sex in your 50's?". Never mind I plan to still get my freak on as long as i'm breathing. BUT I won't let Madison hear a thing about it EVER. I swear!
Welcome back you were missed.
I was laughing aloud as I read this. Laughing at you has become rather common ;)
Happy New Year and kick the bronchitis soon. (I have bronchitis too but it's mostly been under control the last couple of years).
(1) I've always wondered why children find it so distasteful to entertain, at least, the fact that their parents have a sexuality--after all, if they didn't, you wouldn't exist.
If you think back to the 17th and 18th centuries, when many families lived in one-room houses and tenements, any kid who had a younger sibling would have had to have been in the room when mommy and daddy were doing it. I wonder how they coped if (or perhaps I should say "when") they saw it.
I remember too in an earlier post that your mother was upset with you for having sex. I can imagine that a little easier. Admitting to the fact that your kid is sexual means admitting to the fact that you're getting old.
(2) I'm pretty sure your mother understood where that invitation was going.
(3) Dear, how I have missed you.
There you are! I was wondering if you ditched us or maybe hit the lotto and had moved into that cabana on the beach without telling me!!! ;)
Oh that is DEFINITELY TMI!!! My Peanut Mom and I are close but when she starts talking about sex...with my Peanut Dad...and images pop unbidden into my head, I want to poke a #2 pencil in my minds eye to get rid of that image!!!
SO GLAD to see you back...HAPPY NEW YEAR! Hope you're feeling better!
Welcome back!
I KNOW my parents have never had sex - eek - ewwww.
xoxo
jazzi
7 - So sorry to have disrupted the fun! lol.
Cakes - I hear ya! The age thing doesn't bother me as much as I just don't want to know the details. I'll dish with my girls all day long but I could do without the intimate details from Mom. eeeewww.
SJ - Missed you too!! And I'm glad you're having a good laugh ;) So sorry to hear about your bronchitis although I'm glad it's under control. I don't think I could live with this on an on-going basis!
X - (a)I've often wondered how those living arrangements worked. Maybe children were more niave then? Come to think of it, I somewhat walked in on my parents when I was younger and, other than being embarrassed, it didn't bother me. Hmmm.... I wonder what changes as we age?
(2) Yes, that the part that freaked me out. How did she know?? Obviously, Mom knows a little more about sex than I give her credit for. lol.
(3) Missed you too, hon. *smooches*
PQ - Happy New Year to you too! Glad you stopped by. Been busy at work...which I'll explain in another post!
Jazzi - My, my, my...where have you been??? I thought you had stopped blogging completely. Thanks for stopping by!
Welcome back!!
Hope you had happy holidays!
Yeah my mom tried to have a "grown up conversation" with me after I got married at 21 to my ex. She started trying to talk to me about her and my dad's intimate life. YUCK!!! NO WAY. When I balked she said "You're grown up now, we should be able to talk about this stuff". I told her NO FREAKIN WAY! I don't want to think/know/hear anything about anything they do other than watch TV! *Cringing* LOL.
I'm one of the very unusual kids who...walked in on her parents going at it (I was 21, and for Christ's sake, they were on the living room sofa! I couldn't have avoided that at midnight while coming downstairs), cheered for them, gave 'em a thumbs up, and walked out of the room, proud that they still loved each other and had a sex life at their age. ALL THREE of my sibs, when they found out what I saw, were repulsed. So, I guess I'm just the abnormal one there!
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