I'm busy, busy, busy

To my merry bunch of misfits:
I'm a busy little beaver at work today so I leave you with a sexy little video. Since I don't have time to really write a post....feel free to ask random questions if you like. Have a great weekend!

Oooooo, S-H-I-N-Y

It's that time again. My car, whom I used to love dearly, is dying a slow death. The engine is once again losing compression (girl translation: when you push down the accelerator, it won't go fast) and after replacing several gaskets and a radiator last year I can't justify sinking more money in it. Besides, it's almost paid off which is simply a guarantee that something much more expensive is about to break.

It's time to start doing my homework. I usually pick a few models that I like and do the research into safety, reliability, etc. until I narrow it down to the best choice for the price. Then I start perusing the dealerships for a replacement. This sounds like a very intelligent process. But it all goes out the window when I see something like this:

It doesn't happen at every dealership but eventually it does...and that's when I know I've found my dream car. I call it the "ooooo, shiny" syndrome. I know the minute it hits because I lose control of the ability to distinguish between what I want and what I need. The drool starts to string out the corner of my open mouth. My eyes glaze over and all the blood rushes from my head. I don't know where it goes but I'm pretty sure, if I was a guy, I'd have a woody. This is an instant hit with the salespeople because they know the only words I can utter are "where do I sign?" and "trade-in? Oh, just take it". This is actually how I ended up with my current vehicle. All it takes to seal the deal is a split-second sight of myself behind the wheel. Ever wonder why dealerships have mirrored windows? It's for suckers like me.

You gotta admit, she's sharp. A 6.1L Hemi V8 with 425 horsepower....whoa, I need to go lie down....the blood just rushed from my head again.

Summertime

I love summer but I think no one enjoys it more than kids. It's a shame as adults we get bogged down with the responsibilities of life and can't take time to enjoy it like we did back then.

I remember……

1. the last day of school
2. turning over rocks to see what lives beneath
3. picking up the grossest thing underneath the rock and chasing the nerdy neighbor kid with it.
4. playing wiffle ball using cardboard and paper plates as bases
5. sitting on the sidewalk watching a bug and being amazed by it
6. catching lightning bugs in glass jars
7. riding bikes until we got tired
8. realizing we had to ride ALL the way back home
9. kool-aid moustaches
10. lying in the grass searching the clouds for one that resembled something
11. sneaking out of bed to stare at the stars
12. reading Stephen King novels by flashlight under the covers to avoid being detected (Ok, that was probably just me)
13. camping out in the backyard
14. “Mom, he’s TOUCHING me!”
15. Being “it”
16. Picking up foul balls at the baseball diamond and turning them in for a piece of Super Bubble greeen apple gum
17. sparklers
18. "Mom, he's doing it AGAIN!"
19. when staying up late meant 10 p.m.
20. homemade ice cream
    

2,996 Voices

I remember it like it was yesterday. It was a beautiful late summer day. The weather had no idea that fall was not far off - or it didn't care - as the day was warm and the sky was blue with just a few puffy clouds. I remember staring at the sky that morning and thinking how inviting it looked; begging me to remain outside entranced in its beauty. I had no idea how important that sky would become that fateful day.

Disbelief was the first emotion to set in. How could this have happened? Then I thought of my family and wondered, in the chaos that followed, if I would see them again. Momentary panic set in as I thought about my mom at work in the defense sector and then a wave of relief as my brain grasped for reality and remembered that she wasn’t at work. Most of all I remember watching the sky through the window that was just to my left and thanking God that the only thing I could see were big, puffy clouds.

I remember watching it happen all over again on the news that night. I remember seeing the debris cloud roll into the streets blocking sight of everything and everyone. I remember people posting thousands of “have you seen me” flyers and again thanking God that I knew where my family was. I remember being numb for days on end and wondering if life would ever feel normal again.

September 11th is a day we will never forget. We will forever remember where we were when it happened and how we felt in the hours and days that followed. This year is the 5th anniversary of that solemn day. A blogger, D. Challener Roe, is trying to put together a tribute to the 2, 996 that fell that day. If you’re interested in participating, go to his blog and sign up. He’ll send you the name of a victim and a link to a website that contains biographical information. I’ve also found that information is easily attainable just by goggling the person’s name. Your assignment is to pay tribute to that person's life, in any way you feel comfortable. Then on 9/11/06, we will all post our tributes - 2996 voices, telling 2996 stories, celebrating 2996 lives.

Please check it out and/or pass on the word. He only has 10% of the bloggers needed and could really use your help to make this a success.

A Question for the Married Ones

I've noticed a trend with my married friends lately. It seems that they are all coming to me for advice on the same issue. I'm not sure why...being the one person they know who has never been married would seem to make me unqualified to give advice on this situation.

Most of my married female friends complain because their husbands are rarely home. The husbands work full-time, maintain the house and yard and play golf or have some other interest/hobby. This becomes a bone of contention with the wives because they feel that the husbands are not interacting with the kids enough or just not home enough and the wives feel that they are left to make up the difference. Most of the wives do not have activities or interests outside of the home. Their lives are spent working, taking care of the house and the children. They feel guilty if they leave the house to enjoy another activity because working full-time takes enough time away from the house and the kids. Much fighting and crying is done over this issue. Several have threatened to leave and all have given me advice to skip the marriage and just have the kids "because you end up doing it all yourself anyway".

Conversley, I have a male friend who confides in me about his marriage. He works full-time, maintains the house, the yard and has a part-time job that he performs on most weekends (he's in a band so I really feel it's a hobby/job). He maintains the part-time job to help pay support for his 2 children from previous marriages while maintaining his current family in the lifestyle they are accustomed to. His wife criticizes him constantly for not being home or not interacting with the kids enough when he is home. He feels that everything he does is wrong because nothing he does seems to please his wife. He feels guilty for spending time away from the kids but doesn't see a way to maintain a better balance between work and home and still provide for his family. I think his wife feels the same way that the wives do in the situation I described above.

I'm curious if this is typical of the early years of a marriage? It would seem that balance is key to any resolution of this situation. I've tried to convince my female friends to get a hobby or find an activity outside the home to create more balance in their lives. The response I usually get involves the guilt factor. I guess I compare it to work. When I'm burnt out at work I don't perform to the best of my abilities; I don't have the energy to give 100%. After awhile, I start to resent those that I work for and with because they're pushing to expend more energy than I can give at that moment. I take vacation to avoid burn-out (which didn't work this last time). Having an outside hobby or activity is like a vacation in that sense.

At the same time, if both husband and wife are out of the house maintaining the balance in their lives who's watching the kids? Most of you are married, what are your thoughts or suggestions?

WoooooooHooooooo

Back on vacation today! Love ya all dearly... but I'm outta here.

BAAAAAAD DAY

It's 9 a.m. and I am drinking a beer. Why would one imbibe alcohol so early in the morning you ask? I'll tell you. I am supposed to be on vacation until 7 a.m. Monday morning. Instead I am hooked into a computer because an incompetent be-otch has decided that she is too busy to do her work. Thus, I had to return from vacation in order to straighten Ms. A-hole out.

My plan for today was: Drive to local store to buy kiddie pool since I don't have access to a real pool. Pick up margarita mix while there. Continue to liquor store to buy tequila. Return home and hook up hose to fill said kiddie pool. Put on bathing suit (two piece to scare the neighbors). Make pitcher of margaritas. Put beach music CD into stereo. Play said stereo LOUDLY. Jump into kiddie pool and tan ALL DAY. It was a really cool kiddie pool too. The kind with a slide and ring toss in case you get bored.

So far today I have: spilled an entire cup of coffee (no, not the small kind...a travel cup) on the kitchen counter soaking everything including the paper towels (you have to laugh at the irony). Sent scathing email to incompetent be-otch reminding her that it is much easier to work if your head is not BURIED IN YOUR ASS. Copied everyone except God on said email so that they would know that I returned from vacation to deal with said be-otch. Spent the last half-hour waiting for our almightly lawyers to respond to me with ideas on how to off Ms. A-hole....oops, I meant on what my next step should be. **Update** Add in dealing with Blogger's seizures this morning.

I AM NOT HAPPY. If anyone would be willing to go to Houston and do something completely nasty to the incompetent be-otch I would be willing to pay.

The Weekend: Frumpy Clothes & Wild Monkey Sex

Before I start this post, let me just clarify that the bar dancing will be done later this summer in North Carolina or possibly Panama City Beach, if that trip falls through. And Micki, because I know you're lurking, let me just say that I may pour tequila down your throat and drag your butt up with me. No worries, Uncle Bob will take pictures...if for no other reason than to blackmail us at the next family function.

Long Weekend Wrap-Up

1. Much time spent with Mom shopping for something sexy to wear to her upcoming class reunion. Realization that what I think is sexy and what Mom thinks is sexy are 2 different things. There is a "frumpy factor" to contend with. At a certain age your taste turns to clothing that your female friends find attractive. Note to Amy & Micki: Shoot me if I reach this stage and am still unmarried.
2. Long discussion of Mom's great figure and her un-willingness to show it off. I tried to explain the theory that men are inherently aware that women are naked under their clothing and that clothing that makes the shape of your figure known actually helps them picture your nekkidness which in turn makes you more attractive. Note: I'm not trying to turn my mother into a hoochie but just get her to stop wearing boxy t-shirts just because they have a cute flower pattern on them. She refused to believe that I might have a clue.
3. Finally saw The DaVinci Code. Great movie and I think easily understandable by those who haven't read the book. Although, knowing the theories behind it and understanding the intricacies of how it all ties together makes the theory more believable. Still good movie on it's merits alone.
4. Realized that my mom would not make a good beach bum as she cannot vegitate for more than 15 minutes unless it involves sleeping. Now searching for a way to convince her to relax more often.
5. Breakfast with my grandmother and my grandather's remaining sister and brother. They love to gather for breakfast when I'm in town. I love that they want to spend time with me and enjoy listening to their stories. Besides, they remind me of my grandfather who I miss very much. For being in their 70s & 80s, they are still very active. I can only hope that I maintain their zest for life when I reach that age.
6. Listened to Mom chastise my aunt for staying out until 4 a.m. because "nothing good can happen after midnight". Explained the concept of staying out until bar close & then heading to Waffle House (or Denny's in this case) to stave off the hang-over. She is convinced that the phrase "stayed out until 4 a.m. talking at Denny's" equals "I had wild hot monkey sex with someone I picked up in a bar".
7. Spent an evening with my old friend, Vince, talking and laughing over homemade pasta & too much beer. Did something that I swore I wouldn't but don't regret and now I don't know how I feel. Very possibly proved Mom's point since I didn't make it home until 3 a.m.
8. Realized that I need to spend less time analyzing the choices I make and more time enjoying life.
9. Made acutely aware by Mom that, at 35, I'm still not too old to be scolded by my mother and that there are rules in her house. See #7.
10. Reminded Mom that some day she will be old and need taken care of and if she doesn't want to end up with my brother she might want to loosen the rules in her house a bit.
11. Spent airplane ride home trying to sleep while seated next to the most annoying mother/son combo I have ever met. It was very obvious that at 45, he still let his mother rule his life. I had to lay down some rules when she started picking lint off my yoga pants.
12. Spent tram ride from the concourse to baggage claim repeating "Oooo, Grant would like her" in my head. It seems that Monday is J-usagi day in the Atlanta airport.

That's the wrap-up of my long weekend. Missed you all bunches!

Why I haven't posted....

Why I haven't posted or commented on your blogs lately:

1. My dog ate my computer
2. I've downloaded so much porn that my computer refuses to work without being rubbed first.
3. I was kidnapped by aliens, taken to another planet and forced to re-populate the species with Kenny Chesney. Forced...yeah...right.
4. All those conspiracy theories at Xdell's blog finally earned me a trip "re-programming" camp.

Truth is, I've been slammed at work the last few days. I'm trying to take a few days off and of course, at the last minute some urgent project came up that had to be completed before I left. I'm beginning to think they plan this. What good does it do to accrue vacation if you can't use it????

I'm outta here until sometime next week. Who knows...on the way back from Ohio I just may get a wild hair up my arse and decided to change my ticket to some locale with the word "Beach" in it's name...Myrtle, Daytona, Miami....aaaahhhh, sand between my toes.....

I'll try to catch up on my blog reading asap ;)

***Summer plans update****

Weekend get-away to Lake Norman to socialize with the Redneck rich-n-famous. I'm getting on the bar at Coyote Ugly & Micki promises to take pictures!!

Long weekend to Panama....within the next month or so....hopefully before the Hurricanes!

A Question for the Guys

I have a question for the guys. It's perplexed me for some time. You see, women feel the need to get all prettied up in order to attract a guy. We spend lots of money buying products to make our hair silkier, hide our wrinkles and make our eyelashes darker so you'll notice when we bat them at you . We spend hours delving through magazines in pursuit of the right hair cut, more time in front of the mirror making it look just right and we carefully apply make-up to highlight our best features. We spend hours trying on every piece of clothing we own, to compose just the right outfit. We SAY that we do this to make us feel more attractive but, in reality, we do this for YOU. I mean really, have you ever seen an eye lash curler? It resembles a midevil torture device. Do you really think we use it just to impress ourselves? Please.

So, here's my question. I can do all of the above, go out to a bar and maybe get a guy to buy me a drink - maybe. But I can go to Home Depot in a tattered t-shirt, hair a mess - possibily with paint, dirt or grass clippings in it dependent on what home improvement project I'm working on and no make-up and get followed around the store by EVERY male sales associate in there? Now, I know it's their job to be helpful but staring at my ass is not helpful unless the directions for faux painting or changing the oil in the lawn mower are written on it. You guys know that I strive to understand the male species but please...clue me in...what is this phenomenon?????

Wallowing In It

I ran across a letter last night while I was looking for something to post. I've been super busy at work this week and haven't had the time to write much of anything so I was searching for a quick meme or tag. Instead I found a letter written to the last ex. We'd been dating off and on for a while and it was time that one of us pulled our cajones out and made a move. He told me to decide what I wanted. I knew what I wanted and I spelled it out in that letter.

Of course, it didn't work. If it was meant to work it would have been much easier from the beginning. When it did finally end, I was so fed up with his dart in & then run for cover method of dating that all I could think of was the best way to hide the corpse. The problem is that I've been so busy trying to figure out how to poke his eyes out with a spoon that I didn't take time to wallow. Girls need to wallow when relationships end, no matter what type of relationship it was or how long it lasted. It's how we assess the damage, learn from our mistakes and move on.

If you noticed, I've not been very introspective lately. I think it's because I knew there was a good wallow waiting patiently in that closet in my mind. You know, the one full of the things I don't want to deal with? The one I keep locked? I wasn't ready to disturb it before but I've put it off long enough. Tonight, it will be time to wallow. I'm getting a bottle of wine and a pint of Ben & Jerry's and I will wallow my little heart out. And when the sun rises Saturday morning, I will be prepared to continue my quest for Prince Charming...this time a little wiser for the experience.